Cheap Hotels In - Hippo Hassles and Problem Lions

Huh, tough schedule! Eat and usually get to bed around 2300 hours, then we would shower. Bruce likes to hunt hard and our days usually begin around 0400 hours and we usually get back to camp around 2100 hours, like me. Hunting buddy and client Bruce, the first hunt of my 2006 Tanzanian season started in Masailand and was with my old friend.

It's also home to the largest game populations in Africa. The Selous is the largest game reserve in the world at five million acres with a further two million acres or so of buffer zone. We boarded the charter flight which took us to the Selous Game Reserve in the south of the country, at the end of the ten days hunting. We hadn't been able to get a lion on bait, however. All over forty inches and a selection of the northern plains game species that are unique to that area, three nice buffalo, our first ten days hunting had been spent in Masailand where Bruce had taken a monster leopard.

Just as soon as it got dark and he recommended we might consider an early dinner and possibly an early night, it wasn't his or the staff's fault and I'd find out why, and told me that although he was very sorry they weren't properly ready for our arrival, he looked me bang in the eye. When I saw this I asked the camp manager to explain why this was. But we were missing a few of the niceties such a fences and a proper camp fire area, bathrooms were built and the kitchen was functional, tents were up. So I was very surprised to find the camp not quite ready for our arrival, and they usually take care to see things get done the way I like them, and my staff know it, i'm a fussy so and so when it comes to my business.

The night exploded with lion roars and an entire pride appeared in camp as if they owned it, as the dusk gathered. The reason for all this became apparent, just about then. Waiter and camp manager stayed around and they made a point of sticking close to the dining room, chef, most of the staff disappeared and only the night guard (who climbed into his tree seat early), as soon as it got dark.

Bruce and I decided that more drastic measures were required. These cats really were very hungry and very determined! They'd reappear again, but within a few minutes of our driving past, sure they'd melt into the bush as we drove at them or duck as we put a barrel of birdshot over their heads. But nothing worked, gunshots and even chased them in the hunting truck a few times, we tried driving them away with a variety of noise makers. So I decided we had to do something about the situation, ). I think that's what they said, was getting worse every night and they were scared spitless (at least, the camp manager came and told me that this had been going on for weeks! It turned out these cheeky and very hungry felines had gotten into the habit of spending most of every night walking between the tents and roaring their heads off in the hope of scaring someone out of their tent and coming to join them for dinner and I reckoned it was only a matter of time before someone got frightened enough to do just that.

Exquisitely beautiful and jam packed with dirty great crocodiles and shed loads of hippo - my two least favourite African animals, very fast flowing in places, is about 500 yards across, in and around the Kilombero River which was right next to camp, the first thing we needed was a very large hunk of meat to use as bait and the nearest large hunks of meat (otherwise known as hippos) were walking about!

. . . Which went something like this, i had a quick Chinese parliament with my hunting team, before I asked Bruce to take the shot, however. His ears had been chewed off in some long forgotten battle and he was more than ready to check out and let a younger bull take over, he was very old and battle scarred. We took a stroll down the river to see what we could see and by about 08.00 hours had found a very suitable candidate.

' Any comments? Me: 'It's a good hippo but I think we'll have trouble getting him out of the river once we've shot him.

' Tell the Bwana to shoot. (Mzee is a term of respect that means 'old man') we'll get him out of there easily, team: 'No problem Mzee.

Me: 'Well I'm not so sure and I don't want to risk anyone's safety'

Trust us' We're close to camp and can get extra staff to help and the river is not very deep here, it'll be no problem, team: 'Bwana Mzee.

Not to me, at least! Not a chance, oh no. But would they ever admit that, now there's not much water in Masailand where they come from and it's likely that most Masai can't actually swim? And they often let this cloud their judgement, but also being seen to be brave, all Masai take extreme pride in not only being brave. . . . . . . . . Such as, but I forgot to take a few things into account, so I did.

My job at this point was to stay on shore and keep them covered with my rifle. They also each cut themselves a long wooden pole and then off they went into the water with one carrying the longest piece of rope we had. All of the staff decided to fill their pockets with large stones to throw at any crocs or hippos that got too close or too curious, being a little light on logic and heavy on courage. Was at the river, every single staff member including the old stuffed up cook who must have been at least 70 years old, the next thing I knew. But he was to turn out to be a far bigger nuisance after death than he ever have been before it, bruce took his shot and the hippo died as he should, anyway!

They tied the rope to the carcass and started to pull. So good, so far. They slowly made it to the dead hippo which at this point was about 70 yards from shore. This is always done with a great deal of hilarity as the Africans in general and the Masai in particular have a great sense of humour. Laughed and beat the water with their poles to scare the crocs and hippos away from them, they sang, as the guys make their way out to the dead hippo.

Had their chips and I could almost see myself in front of an investigation tribunal having to explain how I'd managed to drown four naked Tanzanian citizens, i honestly thought all four had! Most made it but three got swept away in the current and a forth lunatic or very brave man decided to throw himself back in to try to save them. With a rifle in my hand watching 25 bare arsed Africans trying to head for shore or at least for the shallows, so there was I! Their stone filled pockets stopped them from getting up to the surface again and the only way they could regain buoyancy was to drop their trousers and kick for the surface, to make matters worse. But so did all the staff as every one of them had the rope wound round their arms, not only did it disappear into the depths! The damned thing suddenly decided to sink like a stone just as it reached the deepest part of the river, as the guys began pulling the hippo back to shore. Was hell bent on revenge, despite being as dead as charity, this particular hippo. Was I wrong or what, oh boy! . . . . . . . . Or so I thought. So no problem, our guy had been dead for over an hour and was bobbing about on the surface. The animal floats to the surface, a dead hippo usually sinks for a while when it's shot and then as the gases in it's belly blows up.

They'd have hit the confluence of the two rivers and the next stop would have been the Indian Ocean, had the guys been swept another hundred yards or so! I was rapidly developing a lot of new grey hairs, meanwhile. Was perched up on the bank laughing like a drain and trying to capture the entire fiasco on video, who had been unaware of the seriousness of the situation, bruce! They all managed to avoid all the big 'n nasties in the river and ended up in the shallows a mile or so downstream, and I really don't know how, somehow. The gods must have been with them though.

Turned out again for a second attempt to get our hippo back to shore, who incidentally had refused to go back to camp until the job was finished, including the four near drownees, the entire team, incredibly. I was actually rather hoping we'd seen the last of him but no such luck! But this time about 300 yards from shore, the hippo had popped up again, by the time I'd got the staff rounded up and administered the necessary basic first aid.

AGAIN! . . . . . . . When a big tiger fish jumped right beside me and scared the living daylights out of me, i was still standing at the river's edge covering the staff with my rifle and trying to keep an eye out for crocs in the water and lions and hyenas on the land, as the staff were pulling the last piece out of the water. We eventually got the last piece of it back to camp sometime after midnight! There was no way I was even going to leave a single pound of meat for the hyenas, as it had cost me so many grey hairs. Bear in mind we'd shot the animal at 08.00 hours and we still hadn't cut up the carcass and got it back to camp. We managed to get the hippo on shore by about mid afternoon, this time it went like clockwork and after a great deal of pulling and pushing.

I TRULY HATE HIPPO HUNTING!

But I was just too tired not to sleep, i don't know about Bruce. The lions kept everyone except Bruce and I awake with their caterwauling, that night, as usual. As she had the knowledge and the ability to handle the situation, good job for me she's made of the right stuff though. Hadn't been particularly impressed with our leaving her alone in camp for so long with just a.404 Jeffery and the lions for company, the Lions were still coming around as soon as the sun went down and I have to tell you that Mama Susan, needless to say! It was back to camp for a quick and well deserved whisky with a late dinner, after that.

Remember how I told you they take great pride in their courage? We drove back to the skinning shed and the plan was to send the (Masai) skinners back to Susan in the dining room for their own safety, i then moved the staff round to the client dining area to be looked after by Mama Susan and the.404 (both shoot like a dream) and just before dark. Wide shooting alley through the bush between the two, i had the guys cut a hole in the back wall of the skinning shed (made from wood poles) and then peg a big hunk of hippo about 15 yards away and a nice, the next morning. We were ready to get everything set up for the next time our leonine friends came to try to join us for dinner, now that we had the meat for bait and as we knew exactly what the lions were doing and when they were doing it.

But I just have to love 'em, the Masai drive me crazy sometimes! Before deciding to join his buddies, then his knives and then casually relieved his bladder, washed and dried his hands, then the third one came out and with a smug grin on his face. Made a great show of washing his hands and knives before putting them away and casually climbing into the truck, then the second one came out. He slowly put his knives away safely before climbing into the truck, the first one sauntered out and despite the roaring lions wandering around.

And one of them could make themselves useful by taking charge of the spotlight, i told them they were a silly pair of buggers and to get their arses into the skinning shed with Bruce and I. That's what they were going to do, they looked very offended and told me they were my trackers and their job was with me and if it meant they had to sit out in the truck while we shot one, when I told them to go back to Mama Susan and the others before they got eaten. ) sitting on the open back of the spare hunting truck that was parked just a few yards away. (Masai again, my two trackers, i saw Kindiki and Mweni, as we were closing the wooden door! Bruce and I then went into the shed to wait for the lions.

Hit the ground and never moved again, he turned a backward somersault. The Lion leapt into the air and I nailed him with an insurance shot (as it turned out) just below his left eye, at the shot. H, battered 375 H& his old, bruce immediately whacked him in the chest with a frontal heart shot from 'ol smoking Joe. I told Bruce to take him, and as soon as I'd identified him as a mature male, a big 'ol Simba and his ladies bounced up to the bait, a little while later as the sun went down.

They all seem to have the most god-awful bad breath problem, it's a funny thing about lions. I had the nose of a Lioness no more than 6 inches from my knees and the muzzle of my rifle, at one time! We had a whole load of very upset females to get rid of including two or three that came right over to the skinning shed to peep through the thin wooden poles of the wall. Then all hell broke loose!

Everyone gets free drinks and the staff dance a lot, backs are slapped, songs are sung. Which is a celebratory party for both clients and staff alike. ! ! Followed by photographs and the fine Tanzanian tradition of Kabubi, then we had a quick drive back to camp! I've never seen a dead animal get loaded onto a truck as quickly as we loaded that lion! They didn't go far and we continued to get glimpses of them through the bush, even then. Cursing and a few barrels of bird shot over their heads, we eventually got rid of them with a great deal of shouting.

I'd have suggested it to him, i have to say that if he hadn't suggested it to me. Bruce had asked that I should put in an insurance shot as we so close to camp and neither of us wanted any wounded lions bouncing around in a camp full of people, but in this case, or after them, i should add that I'm not usually in the habit of shooting clients animals for.

Even if she didn't, at least I'd get some sleep that way! I'd be left in the land of Nod, but until then, she'd wake me, we 'agreed' that if one came into the tent, eventually. ) but she wasn't very happy with having these lions around the camp. To live with me, she has nerves of hardened steel (she has to, in fact! Susan doesn't usually get fazed easily. I wasn't getting much sleep at all, the lions and Mama Susan waking me up umpteen times a night to tell me the lions were right outside the tent, between that. Was getting helluva tired, i and the rest of the hunting team were hunting and travelling at least 18 hours a day and I at least, bruce! It was a bloody nuisance and dangerous to boot, it wasn't just annoying. The rest of the pride came back and resumed their old tricks of walking between the tents roaring, and for the next two nights, that night. That wasn't the end of the story though.

This is something they're very sensitive about and are inclined to heavily fine any Professional Hunters who do that kind of thing without very good reason. Honour was satisfied and I wouldn't have to explain to the game department why I'd broken their rules by shooting a whole bunch of lions without prior approval from HQ, which was just dandy with me as the camp then remained safe, i guess the lions must have heard that conversation because they never came back to camp after that and instead stayed in the thick bush just behind camp where they took to eating waterbuck instead of trying to hunt humans. He even presented me with a letter stating that he considered this action necessary in the interests of protecting human life. The Game Scout came to see me on the third morning after we'd taken the lion and told me he was still very concerned about the lion situation (as was I) and we agreed that I'd go and shoot as many as necessary to force them out of the immediate area.

Didn't cost the lives of any future lion kings, that particular pride didn't have any dependent young amongst their numbers and hopefully the inevitable pride takeover, as far as I'm aware. I decided it was justified as the risk to human life outweighed the normal principles of ethical lion management, but in this case, and the pride holders are on their way out and the takeover is imminent anyway, i don't usually shoot pride holding males unless there are no dependent cubs around.

I'd have shot the lion myself and written it up as in defence of human life, had the client not had a lion on his licence or not wanted to take that particular lion in that particular way.

It's traditional that a new camp be named by the first Professional Hunter to visit it and for the obvious reason I named this one Simba Camp and I'm glad to say it still has that name today and the staff regularly tell the story to anyone that'll listen.